My Trip to Publix Grocery Store

Here in Florida, there is a wonderful grocery store called Publix. Today my trip to Publix did not go that smoothly.

First, I tried to walk across the sidewalk to the front door, but a lady with a bowl cut stopped in front of me because she needed to look at the bottom of her cart, apparently. I was awkwardly in the way of several more carts and couldn't think of any small talk for the wait, so I just stepped back to the edge of the sidewalk to wait it out. Suddenly, I saw something amazing. And it's name was a stack of inflatable innertubes! I did a fake stretch like I was tired and leaned up against the softy innertube pillar. But it turned out that the pole holding the stack was a flimsy plastic stick, and I got bounced all around and almost knocked over a pile of skim boards. I tried to straiten the stack, but my arm got caught and I pushed the tubes farther away. It took a couple minutes before I just gave up and walked away really fast. There was a lady weighing herself on a scale inside the door who seemed to be enjoying my troubles. She kept watching and laughing at me. You know what? I think she just stayed there longer to watch me fail. Because how long can it actually take to weigh yourself?

Once I got inside the store, I realized that it was about 20 degrees below freezing in there. Pretty soon I casually strolled over to the deli place and stood in front of the meat warmer to warm up a little. It was awkward because the deli guy wanted to take my order, so I pretended to be really intrigued by the row of juice on the other side of the aisle.
After a minute, I ventured out to the rest of the store to do some food shopping.

While I was walking down the bread aisle, I saw something fun stuck under the rack! It was a big blue bouncy ball! I picked it up and started dribbling it all around. Pretty soon it accidentally bounced into some spaghetti. And also some marshmallows and some black beans. I was asked to not do that anymore. Also, I got the ball removed from me.

Later, I walked down the hair and soap aisle and knocked into a jutting out rack of shower caps with my shoulder. Good thing the store guys made the rack of shower caps jut out. Because otherwise all of the many people looking for shower caps would have a harder time finding them.
Some other kids were watching me with weird looks on their faces, so I stood there awkwardly again for a second and decided I should do something, so I picked up a shower cap and started examining it very carefully until they left.

Finally I was about to leave to go check out, but a lady with crazy pink shorts walked in front of my cart and stopped there to get a bag of dried fruit. Then a lady beside my cart was trying to choose her vitamins. She apparently didn't have very good eyesight, so she started slowly backing up further and further until she had her back actually bent over my cart. Finally the crazy pink shorts lady got her dried fruit and started to move away. But I couldn't push my cart
out from under the vitamin lady's back. Before the pink shorts lady finished pulling out, she turned left and saw the vitamin lady. Turns out they knew each other. They then had an upside down conversation over my shopping cart. I stood and waited for them to finish up, and finally I was able to pull out and wheel over to the check out line.

On my way out, I tripped over a fun noodle and smashed into a large, empty cardboard box. It made a loud sound.

I was very glad to get out of there.